Employers across Canada keep telling workers that return-to-office is good for them. They talk about collaboration, culture, connection and even mental health, as if sitting in a cubicle is somehow more emotionally nourishing than being at home with your family. For working parents, however, this message feels deeply disconnected from reality. The very policy that is supposed to improve wellbeing is making their lives more stressful, more expensive and more emotionally draining. When a workplace policy produces the opposite of its stated goal, it is not a misunderstanding. It is a failure of leadership.
How remote work became normal in Canada
Before 2020, working from home in Canada was treated as a rare privilege rather than a practical way to organize work. Even in industries where most tasks were already digital, employees were often required to be physically present simply because that was how things had always been done. Managers equated visibility with productivity, and flexibility was often granted only to a small number of workers, usually those without young children or caregiving responsibilities. For many parents, this meant living in a constant state of conflict between work schedules and family life, with little room for sick days, school closures or childcare breakdowns.
The pandemic forced a sudden and massive shift. Almost overnight, millions of Canadians moved their work into their homes while also caring for children during school closures and public health restrictions. Despite these extraordinary conditions, businesses continued to function. Meetings happened online, projects were delivered and clients were served. In many organizations, productivity remained stable or even improved. For parents, this period revealed something powerful. When given flexibility, they could be both committed employees and present caregivers. Remote work did not weaken the workforce. It allowed families to survive and, in many cases, to finally breathe.
The sudden push back to the office
Now that flexibility is being rolled back, the change is visible almost everywhere. Federal government departments are increasing mandatory in-office days. Large banks and corporations are tightening their hybrid policies. Even tech companies that once built their brand on flexibility are quietly reversing course. Perhaps most disturbing of all, hospitals and healthcare institutions that exist to protect physical and mental health are moving in the same direction, despite seeing first-hand how stress, burnout and family strain affect their own staff.
This shift is not being driven by evidence that remote work failed. The work was already being done. The outcomes were already being delivered. Instead, it is being driven by leadership habits, pressure to justify expensive office space and a desire to reassert control over how and where people work. Parents are the ones absorbing the consequences. They are waking up earlier to get children ready for daycare drop-offs before long commutes. They are missing school pickups and relying on expensive backup care. They are carrying the emotional weight of trying to hold everything together while the system moves backwards.
Mental health organizations present a particularly troubling contradiction. The Centre for Addiction and Mental Health's own research acknowledges that workplace flexibility is protective against mental health decline. The Mental Health Commission of Canada's National Standard for Psychological Health and Safety in the Workplace emphasizes that employers have a responsibility to identify and mitigate workplace factors that harm psychological well-being. Yet these same institutions are implementing rigid attendance requirements that force parents with young children and lengthy commutes into unsustainable schedules that directly contradict their own evidence-based guidelines.
What companies claim return to office is for
When employers defend return-to-office, they usually repeat the same talking points. They say people collaborate better in person, that innovation depends on hallway conversations, that company culture requires physical presence and that being in the office is better for mental health because it separates work from home. These claims sound reasonable until they collide with the lived experience of parents juggling childcare, school schedules and family responsibilities.
For parents, the promise of better collaboration rings hollow when they are spending four hours daily in transit instead of helping with homework. The claim about improved mental health feels insulting when they are too exhausted from commuting to read bedtime stories. Most modern work happens through screens, shared documents and scheduled meetings. Parents were not failing to collaborate from home. They were excelling at their jobs while also being present for their families. Now they are being forced into unnecessary routines that make their lives harder while offering little real benefit to their work or their children.
Despite persistent narratives about productivity loss, the evidence tells a different story. A comprehensive Stanford study published in Nature found that remote workers are equally or more productive than their office-based counterparts, with significant improvements in job satisfaction and reduced turnover. The Conference Board of Canada has documented that hybrid and remote work arrangements, when implemented thoughtfully, enhance organizational outcomes while supporting employee well-being. For parents performing knowledge work that doesn't require physical presence, mandating office attendance is a solution in search of a problem—one that comes at the direct expense of their children and family stability.
Harm 1: Family time is being taken away
Return-to-office policies quietly strip parents of precious hours every single day. Statistics Canada data shows teleworkers saved an average of about 64 minutes per day by cutting out travel to and from the office, time that got reallocated to childcare, housework, leisure and even sleep. Before the pandemic, only about 7% of Canadians worked most of their hours at home, but that number soared into the 30–40% range at the height of COVID-19 remote work before settling near 20% in late 2023. For parents, this shift meant real, tangible time gained back—time that is now being taken away again.
When that time disappears under stricter return-to-office mandates, the effect is not just logistical. It is emotional. Parents report losing moments they once took for granted: reading bedtime stories, helping with homework, being present after school, and those hours are irreplaceable. When routine time with children is squeezed out, parents experience ongoing guilt and stress, and the sense of missing out builds up. This is not a trivial preference, but a measurable shift away from real family life toward work life, and that shift feeds directly into declines in wellbeing.
Canadian research published in BMC Public Health found that work-to-family conflict and increased difficulties in work-family balance are significantly associated with depressive symptoms among employed parents. The Canadian Centre for Occupational Health and Safety explicitly identifies work-life balance as a critical determinant of mental health, noting that inflexible work arrangements contribute to chronic stress, anxiety, and burnout. When parents lose those 64 minutes daily to commuting, they are not just losing time—they are losing the protective buffer that kept their mental health intact.
Harm 2: Financial stress is being forced onto families
Return-to-office doesn't just take time. It takes money. The cost of commuting—fuel, transit, parking, lunches and professional attire—adds up quickly, and surveys show that a significant portion of Canadian workers cite commuting costs as the number one factor influencing their preference for remote work. While flexibility allowed families to reduce these costs during remote work, return-to-office policies reverse those savings and put pressure directly on household budgets.
This financial stress serves as a strong predictor of mental health strain. Though exact Canadian figures on childcare costs and commute expenses vary by region, parents are left paying more just to keep their jobs. For families already stretched thin by housing costs, groceries and inflation, these added expenses contribute to anxiety, difficulty planning for the future and constant juggling of bills. The mental load of managing childcare costs alongside increased work-related expenses is far from theoretical. It is a day-to-day reality for many Canadian households.
Research from the Vanier Institute of the Family reveals that parents with young children report the highest levels of work-related stress, particularly those facing lengthy commutes. For parents commuting from outlying regions to downtown cores—journeys exceeding two hours each way—the cumulative toll is staggering: over 20 hours weekly spent in transit, time stolen from sleep, family connection, and basic self-care.
Harm 3: Parents are being pushed out of the workforce
Rigid return-to-office schedules are forcing some parents into impossible choices. Hybrid work was originally embraced because it helped parents manage both employment and family needs. But as in-office requirements tighten and childcare flexibility shrinks, many parents simply cannot make the maths work. For example, a survey of Canadian workers showed that nearly nine in ten respondents experienced challenges associated with office work, including reduced time for family responsibilities and increased burnout.
When flexibility disappears, some parents choose to leave their jobs entirely. This has a direct ripple effect on household income, career progression and long-term financial stability. For many primary caregivers, the choices are stark: accept chronic stress and impossible schedules, or step back from their careers. That pattern is more than anecdotal. It reflects structural challenges in the labour market where rigid policies push valuable talent out of the workforce, exacerbating inequalities and undermining parents' financial and mental wellbeing.
Research from the Vanier Institute of the Family shows that Canadian mothers continue to bear a disproportionate share of childcare responsibilities, particularly when partners work irregular schedules. Inflexible workplace policies don't just create stress—they systematically push qualified professionals, particularly women, out of the workforce. The Public Health Agency of Canada recognizes that parental mental health directly impacts child development and family functioning. When organizations force parents into unsustainable arrangements, they're not just harming individual workers—they're compromising the well-being of the next generation.
Harm 4: Chronic stress becomes the norm
The reality of return-to-office for parents is not a smooth transition but a cascade of stressors. A recent survey of Canadian professionals found that 47% reported feeling burned out, and 31% said burnout had increased over the prior year. These figures track with broader trends showing that balancing work and personal life remains a top source of stress among employed Canadians.
For parents, this chronic stress is not an occasional inconvenience. It becomes a constant state of high alert: every late bus, every daycare call, every sick child becomes a crisis that threatens work commitments. Without the breathing room that remote and hybrid work once offered, parents are caught in a cycle of urgent decision-making with little margin for error. Over time this kind of constant stress wears down resilience, disrupts sleep and increases the risk of anxiety and depression.
Studies from the American Psychological Association demonstrate that autonomy and control over work conditions are among the most significant predictors of employee well-being and retention. Crisis intervention training teaches professionals to recognize warning signs: chronic sleep deprivation, persistent anxiety, diminished capacity for emotional regulation, withdrawal from previously enjoyed activities. These patterns are increasingly visible among working parents navigating inflexible RTO mandates.
The World Health Organization defines mental health as "a state of well-being in which an individual realizes their own abilities, can cope with the normal stresses of life, can work productively, and is able to make a contribution to their community." Current RTO policies actively undermine these conditions for working parents.
Harm 5: Parents feel invisible and disposable
Perhaps the most harmful effect of return-to-office policies is the psychological message these rules send to parents. In Canada, a strong majority support hybrid work arrangements, but when employers pivot back toward rigid attendance with little consultation, parents feel unheard and devalued. For example, one survey found that while many workers want hybrid options, only a fifth would feel positive about an increase in mandatory office time.
This sense of invisibility that family responsibilities are not recognized as real, systemic concerns corrodes trust and wellbeing. When parents feel like their lived realities are discounted by employers, it impacts morale and engagement and contributes directly to a decline in mental health. People do not leave the workforce because they lack commitment. They leave when they feel their commitment is met with inflexibility and disregard. Return-to-office policies that ignore these dynamics are not just inconvenient. They are psychologically harmful.
Organizations that publicly champion trauma-informed care, psychological safety and holistic well-being teach crisis intervention workers to validate experiences, recognize systemic barriers and advocate for vulnerable individuals. Yet when parents request workplace accommodations to manage unsustainable commutes and caregiving responsibilities, they encounter rigid policies that prioritize physical presence over actual performance. This represents a fundamental betrayal of the values these organizations profess.
What parents can do and where the limits are
In Canada, family status is protected under human rights law, which means parents have the right to request workplace accommodation related to childcare and caregiving responsibilities. This can include remote or hybrid work when it is reasonable for the role. In practice, some parents succeed, especially when they can show their job was already being done remotely. Many others face delays, resistance or subtle pressure to accept partial solutions that still leave them struggling. Collective advocacy can be more effective. Unions, employee resource groups and coordinated staff feedback have been shown to influence corporate policy, particularly when employers fear losing skilled workers. Still, there is a hard truth. Individual accommodation requests cannot fix a system that is designed to prioritize control over human needs.
That is why return-to-office is not just a workplace trend. It is a growing mental health crisis for parents. Chronic stress, guilt, financial strain and emotional exhaustion do not disappear because someone is told to be more resilient. Support matters. Many parents benefit from speaking with a therapist who understands burnout, caregiving stress and work-related anxiety. Therapy does not change unfair policies, but it can help parents process the pressure, protect their mental health and regain a sense of agency. If employers truly care about wellbeing, retention and long-term performance, the solution is not more desks and more commutes. It is trust, flexibility and respect for the lives people are actually living.
Organizations committed to mental health must align their internal practices with their external messaging. This means implementing truly flexible work arrangements that recognize diverse family structures and caregiving responsibilities, conducting rigorous assessments of which roles genuinely require physical presence versus which can be performed effectively remotely, providing meaningful accommodation processes that don't require parents to fight for basic dignity, and measuring outcomes based on performance and deliverables rather than time spent in seats.
We are going backwards
After everything parents and families endured, this is what makes the return-to-office movement so painful. We already proved that there was a better way. We saw that work could coexist with family life, that productivity did not require constant surveillance and that parents did not have to choose between their children and their careers. For a brief moment, the system moved forward.
Now it is moving back.
Return-to-office is not restoring something healthy. It is reviving a model that was already breaking families before the pandemic. It is pulling time, money and emotional energy away from parents and pretending this is progress. The cost of that reversal is being paid in burnout, anxiety and quiet despair inside millions of Canadian households.
Canada prides itself on being a global leader in mental health awareness and suicide prevention. It's time to extend that same philosophy to workplace policy. Organizations—particularly those in the mental health sector—must demonstrate that their commitment to well-being extends beyond public relations and into the lived experiences of their employees.
The evidence is clear. The solutions are known. What's missing is the institutional will to prioritize people over outdated notions of presenteeism. We are not returning to normal. We are returning to something that was never working in the first place.
本文由 Stellocare 創辦人Nicholas Wong撰寫。Nicholas是安大略省的註冊社工，擁有家庭輔導及電腦科學兩個碩士學位，致力於將科技融入心理健康實務之中。
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